Reader Question: Should I Be Worried That My Husband Has a Female Friend?
A reader recently emailed us and asked us if she should worry about her husband having a close female friend that he works with. We share our thoughts on the latest Marriage More podcast!
We love getting question from readers, and we love trying to answer them, but keep in mind, we’re not counselors or professionals at offering advice on how is best to tackle each of the issues or conflict that arise in marriage.
We are here to share our own experience and tell our story with you all and hope that it encourages you and provides some insight for you and your spouse.
Where to get professional help? Check your local church or counseling centers.
Let’s answer the question: Should I Be Worried That My Husband Has a Female Friend?
Our best advise: State the obvious with your spouse and be proactive to have open communication about each other’s friends and the time spent with them.
- Express that it makes you feel like a 3rd wheel when the three of you go out.
- Never allow yourself to spend one-on-one time with a friend of the opposite sex that’s not your spouse.
- Always allow your spouse to meet each other’s friends.
Red flags to note you might be headed for trouble when you’re friends with someone of the opposite sex that’s not your spouse:
- If you’re having discussions about your spouse and your arguments, sex life, finances, etc. with this person.
- If you’re making plans and spending time hanging out one-on-one with someone of the opposite sex who is not your spouse.
- Your spouse is questioning the surplus amount of time you spend with someone of the opposite sex.
- The line of communication is no longer open to discuss or meet the friends your spouse is spending time with.
Be sure to check out our other podcasts for more tips on how to make your marriage MORE!
crystal santi says
Thank you for this .. ?
Dr. Ken Newberger says
Generally speaking, eyes wander and affairs happen because there has been a rupture in the marriage – perhaps not even expressed. Spousal loyalty is like a magnet. If the bond and attraction to your spouse remains constant, it is less likely that you can be pulled away into the arms of another.
Dr. Ken Newberger